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The past counts; it definitely counts in so many ways and for so many reasons. Coincidences aren’t just that. Not really.

Just turned 28 on the 28th this year. And it might seem like just a coincidence, one that occurs to basically everybody once in their lives. Or it might be a bit of ironic fun that the Universe likes to have with us from time to time. To me, it just sounds cyclical. 28 years old on the 28th. If this isn’t the end of a chapter, then I don’t know what is. Even the stars and planets concur on that subject – the end of an astrological cycle and the beginning of another is supposed to happen now. The stars have dictated: I am an adult now, I must act like it. Consolidate, not spread myself too thin in childish desires and dreams…

While I may not be a stranger to the urge to take roots, I reject the idea of limiting myself. I may be an adult now, but I haven’t just stopped being a child. I’m both. I could be neither. It’s not like adulthood is a fixed threshold we can step across and suddenly our reckless, youthful impulses are toned down, while at the same time gaining wisdom and patience to spread around. I may never really stop feeling like a child, longing for protection, reassurance and validation. And yet at the same time, I’ve reached a point where I can tell you with certainty what makes me happy and what keeps me going in life – it’s the people. As simple and as infuriatingly complicated as this gets to be at times, it comes down to the people.

Have patience with me! It’s been a while since I put pen to digital paper, so thoughts and words are rushing out and getting jumbled up in an attempt to be the first to be given proper shape. The road’s been long and winding; it’s not gotten easier and it won’t ever. But it’s gotten clearer.

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